Yeah. It was Friday, and Mom and Sarah were coming down to visit. And they were going to take me and Fizz home for the weekend. They were a little bit late because the new refrigerator had just arrived, so we couldn't go to the Uncommons, and went to the new Stupid Center instead to get pizza. We got a 14 inch pizza, and it cost about 11 dollars, in addition to what came out of my meal plan (I could only use 1 of 3 extra). We had a few (3) pieces left over, and we got a box for them and then I had them walk over the river and through the woods (and then back over the river) with me. Then I went and got Fizz and we got all our laundry and stuff and took it back to the van and went home. Fizz fell asleep in the van, and he woke up just as we were getting back to his house (as I expected).

It was weird to be back home. Other than the new refrigerator and the lack of curtains in my room, nothing had changed. It felt like I had been here the whole time. I ate some coleslaw. Then I went for my standard 8 mile walk and came back and ate ramen and watched a little bit of some movie with Ma and Pa. Then I think I went to sleep.

I had a dream where there was this huge black spider that was as big as the room. He was coming to eat us (me and some other people). We were practicing using this big bread knife and something else to chop stuff up so we could kill the spider. But then he came in and it was all dark and we couldn't see anything. I stuck my hand out and touched some part of the spider that was really weird. Then the lights came on and it wasn't a spider at all. It was a rusty metal thing with heads on it. One of the heads said something like "you never thought a spider could look like this, did you?". Then they encouraged me to chop up the metal thing so I did, and then it turned into a tree. Except there was no trunk. Just branches floating around in the air. So then I started running away from it because if the branches fell on me I'd die. Then alsdkjn dsa,... I woke up.

I went upstairs to do some math homework, but I was really tired so after doing a few problems I went back downstairs and went to sleep again. At about 14:15 I got up and Mom said to get ready to go to the wedding. So I got all dressed up and we got in the car. I asked where the wedding was and Dad said it was in Rockford. So I looked on the Illinois map and found it. We drove and drove and drove and Mom was reading Sarah a book. I looked on the map as we were getting there and told Dad where to turn. The wedding was at an airport. It was kinda weird. It was also really boring. But the wedding part was quick. We were sitting by this really annoying lady who wouldn't stop talking and kept saying the same things over and over. Then we ate food. Then it took a long time to get cake, during which Sarah and I ran around and I read Newsweek. Then we got cake and it wasn't very good. Then we left.

We stopped at a completely automatic gas station and Sarah was making me tell her a story. So I told her another Ralph story:

Ralph was sitting in a pond. Sometimes fish would nibble on his toes. He was very happy in the pond.

Before he went in the pond, he had gone for a walk in the middle of the night. He had gone down some railroad tracks and walked off into the woods on a path. The path led to a lake that was surrounded by pine trees, and the path went around the lake, so he kept following the path. Then the path went north away from the lake again, and he followed it to a road. He then followed the road to the west. Then there was a dirt road to the north and he followed that. Then he decided he should start heading home and took the first path to the east. It went to a farm, so he walked around the farm. Then he kept walking until he ran into a bike trail. He walked on the bike trail and the sun came up and then he found a bench and he layed down and went to sleep on it for a couple hours.

When he woke up he started walking some more until he came to a road that he recognised, and started walking homeward.

He came to a pond. He wondered if it would be a good idea to go sit in the pond. He thought it would be. So he did. And he sat in the pond forever.

But in another universe, Ralph didn't go into the pond. Instead, he walked home and went to sleep on the couch in the basement. Then he got up and went to sleep and went to school the next day.

But in another universe, he got up and wrote a really cool program before going to school the next day.

And in another universe, he went to Pluto and froze.

But in another universe, he forgot all about his walk the previous night and went for another walk. He came to a road and started driving. He was listening to a CD as he drove, but then he realized that it was on the 5th track and he didn't remember the first 4 playing. He was having a really hard time keeping hs eyes open at all so he pulled over and some cars passed him. He was feeling really weird, and figured he must be dreaming...

He woke up. Then he couldn't see anything. His eyes were open, but he couldn't see anything except for a static image. Then he found that he could see a little bit out of the corner of one eye. He went over to the mirror to see what he could see... and he woke up.

For a long time nothing happened...

Ralph was dreaming again. There was this huge black spider that was as big as the room. He was coming to eat them (Ralph and some other people). They were practicing using this big bread knife and something else to chop stuff up so we could kill the spider. But then he came in and it was all dark and they couldn't see anything. Ralph stuck his hand out and touched some part of the spider that was really weird. Then the lights came on and it wasn't a spider at all. It was a rusty metal thing with heads on it. One of the heads looked at Ralph and said "you never thought a spider could look like this, did you?". Then the heads encouraged him to chop up the metal thing so he did, and then it turned into a tree. Except there was no trunk. Just branches floating around in the air. So then he started running away from it because if the branches fell on him he'd die. Then alsdkjn dsa,... He woke up.

Ralph went upstairs to do some math homework, but he was really tired so after doing a few problems he went back downstairs and went to sleep again. At about 14:15 he got up and his mom told him to get ready to go to a wedding. So he got all dressed up and they got in their car. He asked where the wedding was and his dad said it was in some city in another state. So Ralph looked on the map and found it. They drove and drove and drove.

The wedding was at an airport, and it was really boring. But the wedding part was quick. Ralph and his cousin Sam were sitting by this really annoying lady who wouldn't stop talking and kept saying the same things over and over. Then they ate food. Then it took a long time to get cake, during which Sam and Ralph ran around and Ralph read Newsweek. Then thy finally got cake and it wasn't very good. Then they left.

While they were riding in the car, Sam was making Ralph tell her a story. So Ralph started telling a story about Bob.

Bob was going for a walk in the middle of the night. He had gone down some railroad tracks and walked off into the woods on a path and walked around a lake and came to a road. He followed the road to the west. Then there was a dirt road to the north and he followed that. Then he decided he should start heading home and took the first path to the east. It went to a farm, so he walked around the farm. Then he kept walking until he ran into a bike trail. He walked on the bike trail and the sun came up and then he found a bench and he layed down and went to sleep on it for a couple hours.

When he woke up he started walking some more until he came to a road that he recognised, and started walking homeward.

He came to a pond. He wondered if it would be a good idea to go sit in the pond. He thought it would be. So he did. And he sat in the pond forever.

"That's really boring", said Sam.

Ralph agreed that it was boring, so he made up another story that happened in a parallel universe.

In the other universe, Bob didn't go into the pond. Instead, he walked home and went to sleep on the couch in the basement. Then he got up and went to sleep and went to school the next day.

In yet another universe, he got up and wrote a really cool program before going to school the next day.

And in another universe, he went to Pluto and froze.

But in another universe (the interesting one), he forgot all about his walk the previous night and went for another walk. He came to a road and started driving. He was listening to a CD as he drove, but then he realized that it was on the 5th track and he didn't remember the first 4 playing. He was having a really hard time keeping hs eyes open at all so he pulled over and some cars passed him. He was feeling really weird, and figured he must be dreaming...

He woke up. Then he couldn't see anything. His eyes were open, but he couldn't see anything except for a static image. Then he found that he could see a little bit out of the corner of one eye. He went over to the mirror to see what he could see... and he woke up.

Ralph couldn't think of anything else to say, and Ralph's mom told Sam to tell her own story.

Sam told the story of Monsters, Inc.

Ralph pretended to fall asleep on the window because it was really boring. Sam stopped talking. Ralph said "Is that it?".

Sam said "No, but nobody likes my stories."

"That's not your story. You're ripping it off."

"Well I'm no good at thinking up my own stories."

"Neither am I. That's why I take dreams I've had and crazy stuff that's happened to me and make them into stories about Bob."

"Well the only dream I had was that we were making up a new dance."

"oh..."

"Your turn!"

And so Ralph went on trying to think up things that should happen to Bob.

There was this big black spider that was going to eat Bob and his friends. They were going to attack it with big bread knives, but then it came in and turned into a stupid metal couch thing. Then it turned into a tree with no trunk, but only branches floating around. Bob ran away from it because he didn't want the branches to fall on him...

Then he woke up and went upstairs to do math homework. But he was tired so went back to sleep. Then he woke up and got all dressed up because he had to go to a wedding. They all (Bob and his parents and his nephew Jack) got in the Geo Metro and drove to the wedding, which was off in some other state. The wedding was really boring.

"The wedding was not boring!", said Sam.

"Well Bob thought it was boring."

"What about Jack?"

"Fine. Jack thought it was just wonderful. But anyway..."

They finally got cake and Bob didn't think it was very good and Jack didn't finish the frosting. Then they left.

Jack wanted Bob to tell another story about Fred. Fred was a character in the stories Bob usually told Jack when he wanted a story. But Bob was having a hard time thinking of stuff. Finally he made up this story where Fred went for a long walk and on the way back found a pond which he sat in and stayed there forever. But Jack thought that was boring so Bob had to make up another story where there was a parallel universe in which Fred didn't go in the pond, but instead just went home. At that point, it split into 4 other universes. In one of them, Fred just went to school and it was really boring. In another one, Fred wrote a really cool PHP script before going to school the next day. In another one, Fred went to Pluto and froze and that was also boring. So Bob finally cave in and thought up a more non-boring story.

OK, so uhhh... Fred was diving around at night and it was really boring and he was playing a CD and it was weird, because, like, uhhh.... he was listening to the 5th track of the CD but didn't remember hearing the first 4. Then he was falling asleep and had to pull over and some folks passed him and he woke up. Then he couldn't open his eyes for some reason. Wait. He could open his eyes but he couldn't see anything. Then he woke up again and he was happy.

Jack asked if that was it, but Bob was tired of telling stories, so he told Jack to tell his own story. Jack told the story of Monsters, Inc. Bob thought that was boring so pretended to fall asleep on the window. Jack then complained that nobody liked his stories. Bob said that was because it wasn't his story. He was ripping it off. He should use his dreams and stuff to help make up stories. Jack said the only dream he had had lately was he and his friends were making up a new dance. So Jack said it was Bob's turn to tell a story.

Fred was getting attacked by a big spider! It was as big as the room he was in! He was going to attack it with a big bread knife, but when the spider came in it turned into a rusty metal chair thing with heads on it. The heads told him to chop it up more, so he did. The heads complemented him on his chopping. Then the chair thing turned into a tree with no trunk. It was just branches floating around. Fred ran away because he was afraid the branches would fall on him. Then he woke up and did math homework. Then he went back to sleep and woke up again and he had to go to a wedding with his ma and pa and cousin Soozy. Fred thought the wedding was really boring but Soozy thought it was like paradise. When it was over they got back in the car and started driving home. Soozy wanted Fred to tell her a story, so Fred made up a story about a guy named "Nick".

Nick sat in a pond. It was boring.

"That story sucks", complained Soozy.

"Tell your own story, then."

Soozy told the story of Monsters, Inc.

Fred pretended to fall asleep on the window because it was boring.

Soozy said that she couldn't think of her own story.

So Fred told the story of how Nick went to a boring wedding and on the way back his niece Amy wanted him to tell a story and he made up something about some guy named "Dan" sitting in a pond and it was boring.

And Nick went on to make up something about alternate universes so that Dan wouldn't be stuck in the pond forever.

And Dan woke up from this weird spider dream and did some math homework and went to sleep and woke up and went to a wedding, after which his niece Sarah wanted him to tell a story, but Dan hated telling stories, so he pretended to be asleep.

"That's it?", asked Soozy.

"Yup. I'm tired of telling stories. My throat hurts. And we're almost home, anyway."

"The End"

"That story sucked," said Jack.

"Yes, but I'm tired of telling this story. And I'm starting to lose track of all the names."

And Ralph proclaimed that to be the end of the story. And Sam accepted that, which was good because Ralph's throat was getting dried up.

Then we got home.

Mom had left her purple coat in the Rockford airport.

I went to sleep on the couch in the basement while attempting to do math homework. I had a dream like so:

Building a city with SC4000 or something. If your city was happy, they'd build their own fancy buildings. They built really weird buildings. They didn't go straight up. They were diagonal. One of them fell over and made a mess.

Then it was going to be the end of the world. I was asking Fizz if he was planning on doing his math homework anyway. We were all going to be eaten by aliens or something.

We were walking past this garage. This guy came out. It was Rob Zombie or that scary white guy or something. He tried to kill us, so we killed him. This guy down the hallway saw us. We went and washed our hands and we had to get out of there. We got out of the building and I was going to go down this trail to this place I went sometimes. The police were walking behind us. I didn't know if they knew we did it, so we just kept walking. We went into this resturaunt and then I went out through this silo or something in the back. It went down to the ground, where I got out and started walking down this path... I was trying to hide with a bunch of tourists...

Woke up. Wrote this dokent on Mom's computer. I'll upload it to TDO/files/misc and then put it with the other doke stuff later.

Actually I uploaded it to ftp.nw.uwplatt.edu. I worked on math homework as much as I could, ate some soup, and the Waltons picked me up at about 19:15 and took me back to school. That's where I wrote this paragraph. Also brought the popcorn popper.